what babies are made of (hotdogs)

Ma — Sun, 09 Mar 2008 03:14:00 +0000

I'm calling it. "Hotdogs" is outta business. (Don't worry, the bebes are fabulous.)

Fresh start at To the Moon and Back. Thanks for following along.

Ma — Thu, 06 Mar 2008 18:42:00 +0000

The babes are big. and happy.

I suck at blogging.

the end.

Ma — Sat, 26 May 2007 01:34:00 +0000

this has reached the point of ridiculous. time to post already.

charlotte is already over 4 months old and oliver is almost 21 months. time is f-l-y-ing. everyday i'm torn between wanting them to become independent more quickly and wanting them to still need me. i'm finally understanding what people mean when they say their kids grew up too fast. you blink and they're miles on down the road. for that reason, i'm working on keeping my eyes permanently open. it's not working too well.

charlotte is just burning though her milestones. she has reached the 75th percentile for both height and weight. she seems huge compared to oliver at this age. she's already turning over and holding up her upper body when she's on her tummy. she smiles like crazy when a smiling face is looming over her. she coos and sings with gusto. she began sleeping though the night at 3 months!!! this is remarkable, especially since she's still breastfeeding (which is obviously going quite well). not only does she sleep through the night, she sleeps about 10-11 hours a night. our pediatrician said we won the baby lottery.

i was pretty freaked out about having another baby so close to the first. we were lucky that ollie was a happy, easy-going baby. everyone said it couldn't happen again. actually, charlotte is even more laid-back than oliver was. and now that they're both sleeping so well, i've got it made in the shade. i'm just wondering exactly how the universe is going to balance itself out...no one should be this lucky. maybe this is payback for the difficulties i went through after oliver was born. fingers crossed.

ok, everyone wants to know...do we want more children? before having any kids, i thought i'd like to have a big family. at this point, i can't imagine having the resources to have more kids (time, energy, money, brain-power). maybe i'll change my mind later on, but i'm set for now.

oliver. he's a turkey. he's edging on two-years-old and acting like it too. he's still very loving and happy, but he has his moments. he likes to test things out (like, what will happen if i sit on charlotte or what will mom do if i dump all my milk on the floor). he's learned the word "no". and he responds to the word "no" by crying and throwing himself on the floor. on the other hand, he brings me clean diapers and throws out charlotte's dirty diapers, he says "ouch" and gives a kiss when someone is hurt, and he dances with me even when i look crazy. miller's love of baseball seems to be rubbing off on him. he can see the tiniest white sox logo and yell "baseball, baseball, baseball..." with raised eyebrows until i acknowledge it. he even points to the american flag and says "white sox". he says all kinds of words now: baseball, white sox, airplane, truck, car, train, digger, bed, bear, blanket, music, diaper, ball, fish, bird, dog, kitty, orange, apple, grapes, cheese, egg, bread, juice, water, milk, bottle, daddy, mommy, cha cha (charlotte), grandpa, grandma, ellen (degeneres), elmo, baby, tickle, dance, go, yes, no, hat, shoes, socks and a bunch of other stuff that i don't understand yet.

sometimes i miss being in the "real world" and feel weird about not having personal income, but i feel like i have the best job there is. i'm doing my best to cherish every fleeting moment i have with these two incredible people. through all of the sweat and tears, there is so much joy. go babies! now, if only i can get their baseball-obsessed dad on track.... :)

Ma — Sat, 27 Jan 2007 04:26:00 +0000

Charlotte is already two weeks old! Time is motoring by faster than ever now. Mom and baby are splendid. Oliver is his usual happy, peaceful self. He instantly seemed to have a great deal of admiration for his little sister. I’ve been blessed with the loving presence of both my mom and mother-in-law before, during and after the delivery. Miller’s mom was here with us for a little over a week and my mom will be staying for about three weeks total. The help is so, so, soooo appreciated!

The labor, delivery and post-partum recovery has been so much smoother this time around. Little Charlotte seems to have quietly slipped right into our lives. It’s as if we had already carved a space out for her before her arrival and she just nestled right into it. I’m much more at peace this time around, even though life is likely to be a little more chaotic while residing in the “two under two” club. I’m planning on staying home with the little bundles while they’re still tots. Knowing that I won’t have to return to work in the near future brings me great peace of mind (although I never imagined myself as a stay-at-home-mom). I feel so fortunate to have the opportunity to stay home with my children- I certainly see it as a privilege in our society. Let’s just hope I don’t go batty in the house all day. Lots of artsy-fartsy activities and outdoor excursions should do the trick.

I found this nifty checklist which helps you document your birthing experience. Thought this would be easier that trying to remember all of the details of the birth on my own.

The Onset
When did you realize you were actually in labor?
The evening of Thursday, January 11

Where were you?
At home

What did you do?
Waited to see if it was the REAL thing…in the meantime, did some deep breathing and yoga stretches, watched Grey’s Anatomy, took a shower

When did your contractions begin?
Date: Jan 8?? Time: Evening

When did they become regular?
Date: Jan 11 Time: 7pm-ish Intervals: 15-20min

Did you realize any of the following?
Leaking or breaking of water? No
Loss of mucus plug or bloody show? Yes
Pelvic Pressure? Yes
Back Labor or pain? Yes
Baby dropping into birth canal? Yes
Energy surge? No
Nausea or feeling sick? No

On The Road
What time did you leave?
Thursday, Jan 11 at 10 pm

Who drove?
Miller

Who went along?
No one. My mom and Miller’s mom were at our house taking care of Oliver.

What vehicle did you take?
Our Isuzu Rodeo

How did you feel en route?
Excited yet surprisingly calm

Do you remember any specific thoughts?
Has this road ALWAYS been this bumpy?

What route did you take to get there?
Dan Ryan to Lake Shore Drive (the hospital is on the North Side of the city- we just moved to the South Side)

How long did it take to arrive?
Between 20 and 30 minutes

How long did it seem like it took to arrive?
Actually, the time flew by. We were there before I knew it.

At the Hospital
What is the first thing you remember about your arrival?
Crap, I forgot which door I was supposed to go in. I’ll check this one first…ouch!#$&# (contraction)…wrong door. (waddle waddle waddle). OK, here’s the right door.

What was it like?
What kind of question is that?

How much was your cervix dilated upon arrival? 5cm

When did you first see your doctor or midwife?
My doctor was out of town (!), but one of his teammates was on call. She arrived after the epidural was administered and just before it was time for me to push.

Who else was there with you?
Miller, two RNs and an intern
What did you do during contractions?
Deep breaths, focus on being somewhere else, think about Oliver

Where were you for most of your labor?
After checking in at triage I was transported to my labor/ delivery/ recovery room- we never had to move to another room.

How did you handle labor pain?
The pain was much more manageable than it was with Oliver’s birth. Since Oliver was induced one month before the due date I was physically and mentally not prepared for the birth. This time I was much more relaxed and positive. I’m not gonna lie, the pain was intense, but much more tolerable this time around.

What is your most vivid memory of labor?
The robin’s egg blue hospital gown, the awesome nurse I had taking care of me throughout labor and delivery, thinking it was really stupid for me to by lying on my back and strapped to a machine when my body was telling me I should be upright, the hooded sweatshirt that the doctor had on over her scrubs, the rush of adrenaline and determination I had when it was finally time to push, Miller holding my hand and offering me just the right amount of reassurance

When did your water break?
When the intern was checking my cervix my water broke all over the bed and on his scrubs! He had to change his clothes and then resume his work.

Your Baby's Birth
Who was there?
Miller

Do you remember their reaction to the birth?
I was so overwhelmed by the moment, I don’t remember his initial reaction. I do remember him commenting on the fact that the baby had so much hair.

Who do you remember most?
That incredible feeling of awe upon seeing and hearing the baby for the first time. One moment she’s inside of me, the next moment she’s here in the world with us. Surreal indeed. Oh, and I vividly remember Miller cutting the umbilical cord. I said “bye bye” to the baby.

How long did it last?
The regular contractions that I felt at home lasted for about 3 hours. After we arrived at the hospital, the baby was born about 5 hours later. I pushed for about 15 to 20 minutes.

Did you use any pain interventions? Yes- an epidural (hallelujah)
Did you have an episiotomy? Yes- the baby’s head was part-way out of the birth canal
Did you touch the baby's head when it crowned? No
Did you have a mirror so you could see? No
Did you videotape the birth? No
Did they place the baby on your chest? Yes
Who cut the umbilical cord? Miller
Did you nurse right away? Yes
How was that experience? Very easy- I felt a bit awkward at first but the baby latched on right away…just like riding a bike.

Is there anything about the experience that you would change if you had it to do over again?
I would have ensured that I would be able to move about more while still laboring. I was able to handle the pain quite well at home when I could stretch and squat down during and in between contractions. While at the hospital, I was very uncomfortable being on my back/ side during contractions. My instincts were telling me that I should be upright- the baby needed to come down and out, why not assist this process by being upright, eh? Maybe I could’ve gotten by without an epidural if that were the case.

Is there anything about this birth that you would want exactly the same if you had it to do over again?
Miller and Charlotte.

What was the first thing that struck you about your baby?
It IS a girl, look at all that hair, she’s so tiny, she looks healthy

Do you remember what your first thoughts were?
Oh my God, oh my God…there she is!

What was the first thing you said to your baby?
Hey sweetie! Welcome to our family!

Your New Baby
Baby's Name? Charlotte Grace
Date of birth? January 12, 2007
Time of birth? 3:16am
Weight? 7 pounds, 0 ounces
Length? 21 inches
Did your baby have hair? Yes
What color? Brownish black
Was your baby on time? Yes- 3 days before the due date
When did you bring your baby home? Saturday, January 13
What was the weather like? Cold and sunny
Who drove? Miller
How was your first day at home? Happy and overwhelming
Who helped you? The grandmas (my mom and Miller’s mom)

Ma — Tue, 16 Jan 2007 19:18:00 +0000

Welcome to the world Charlotte Grace Bradley!

Born January 12 at 3:16am.
7lbs, 21 inches long.

Details to follow...

Ma — Thu, 11 Jan 2007 22:53:00 +0000

The final stretch seems to have arrived. Here so soon!!!

On Monday I took Oliver up to the Exploratorium in Skokie (quite a drive, but definitely worth it) to meet up with some moms from a Meetup.com group. When I got home I was pretty tired and achy. For most of the afternoon I rested on the couch while Oliver played. By the time Miller got home I was pretty crampy and just feeling "off". We finally got serious about planning out our trip to the hospital and we both started to feel pretty uneasy about what we'd do with Oliver. We have friends and relatives in the city who've offered their help with Oliver, but when time is of the essence, tracking down working folks with limited transportation is not an easy task. Besides, once the big big contractions hit I'm not so sure I'd be thinking logically enough to secure a safe place for Oliver while attempting to get to our hospital way up north before #2 pops. So..., Miller and I got on the horn and pitched a convincing plea to the Wisco Grandmas to come on down and hang out with us. I didn't want them to feel obligated, but really hoped for the extra TLC around here- for ALL of our sakes.

On Tuesday, Grandma Rheta (retired) and Grandma Kris (on vacation) came down to the city. I was feeling pretty run-down during the day, so poor Oliver was a little down -trodden due to my lack of enthusiasm in his normal activities. When the G's arrived Oliver turned into another child. He squeeled and giggled and toddled around the house like crazy. Instantly, I knew we had made the right choice.

On Wednesday, Miller stayed home from work since he's been feeling under the weather with an invincible cold. It was fun to have a full house all day. Oliver put on about a million house miles from all the excitement. I've had a bit more progression toward the labor, but nothing huge. Some of the mucus plug has been shedding and I'm still feeling crampy. More (Braxton-Hicks?) contractions, but nothing earth shaking.

Today I had an OB appointment. My Dr. said that I am 2cm dialated, but that it was too difficult to predict when labor would occur. Not much else to say at this point. The G's, Oliver and I went out for lunch afterwards and then ran a couple of errands. On the way home I started to feel more significant contractions rearing up. They occurred like clockwork every 20 minutes for about 2 1/2 hours. A big piece of the mucus plug (isn't that a glamorous term?) was released after the biggest of the contractions. I don't think I've ever been so enthusiastic about the onset of pain before. Even with Oliver, I wasn't quite ready for the delivery. Being born a month early, I never had the overburdened exhaustion of simply wanting to get the pregnancy over with. Now I'm ready. Bring it on (but gently please).

Ma — Wed, 03 Jan 2007 23:22:00 +0000

Our pals always do Top 10 lists at the end of the year (mainly albums released that year) on our community blog. Here was my contribution for the year:

Didn't get a chance to sample much new stuff this year, but I managed to put together my:

Top 10 Singles of 2006

1. nah nah nah nah nah (feed me now)
2. ta-haa (i'm going to bite your nose now)
3. tane, tane (i see the train)
4. phffftt (i'm walking)
5. top titty (stop kitty)
6. aaahhheeehh (please snoogle with me)
7. diy da doo doo doo (look, i'm doing something remarkable)
8. dada deedee (dad is home)
9. diadia (this soiled diaper shames us both)
9. glahglahgaglooga (wheeeee!)

(Note: all singles are from the artist is DJ Ollie Bubba)

Ma — Wed, 03 Jan 2007 23:05:00 +0000

I'm starting to entirely appreciate the whole "having to pee every 5 minutes complaint" that so many pregnant women have. For the past week or so, I have felt a sudden indescribable pressure on my bladder within seconds of relieving myself. Sometimes I think the little one must be turning her head back and forth over and over in order to create such a sensation. (Imaginary tennis match?) Regardless, it's a nuisance. It's particularly frustrating when subsequent trips to the bathroom only result in thimble-full amounts of urine. Waste of time.

Still trucking. Another weekly Dr's appt tomorrow. Looking forward to spending some time with Oliver downtown tomorrow (the office is right across from the skating rink in Millennium Park). And no, I won't be ice skating.

p.s. Happy Holidays/ Happy New Year :)

Ma — Sat, 30 Dec 2006 15:56:00 +0000

Oliver is a walking maniac. After just 4 short weeks of practice, Oliver is a little dude on the move. I wouldn't be surprised if he'll be running by the end of next month. Oh good, he'll be ready to really tear up the house just in time for the new baby to arrive! I have to say though, I am thankful that I don't have to carry him all over the place while my own body is so burdened down right now.

Only 16 days remain until the big due date. Baby #2 could arrive ANY day now (most babies are born two weeks before or two weeks after their due dates). I've been feeling really good- just more tired and achy than usual. A head cold that's been lingering since Christmas has been a little annoying, but nothing to write home about.

I still haven't tipped the scales at 200 lbs. like I did with Oliver, but I'm getting pretty close. That sounds so wacky to me- I never imagined weighing over 200 lbs. I don't FEEL like I weigh that much, and my friends (yes, even the honest ones) tell me that I don't look like I weigh 200 lbs. Guess I should be lucky I'm tall.

The old nesting instinct is in full-effect right now. I'm always tired but I can't help but constantly tidy things up. It's hard for me to sit still knowing there's a stack of half-opened mail on the dining room table, a basket of baby clothes that need to be hung up, an array of dishes on the kitchen counter, and a smattering of toothpaste on the bathroom mirror. It must be done NOW!!! What if the baby decides to arrive today? I'll never have time to do this stuff later! It's frustrating to see Miller totally unaffected in this manner. How can you just sit there and relax when there's all this stuff to get done? How lazy are you? I have to remind myself that he doesn't have crazy hormones screaming in his ears that the inevitable deadline is looming closer with every passing hour. Besides, it's the holidays. Normal people actually relax during the holidays. We've had an occassional tiff, but overall Miller has been generous with his patience. I just hope it holds. Once the 24-hour feeding marathons begin again, I'm sure my sleep-deprived-self won't be the easiest to get along with. Hopefully we've both learned a few things since Round 1. When the bell signals the opening of Round 2, at least I'll be up and at them- gritting my teeth or not.

Ma — Mon, 11 Dec 2006 01:43:00 +0000

From here on out, I'm in new pregnancy territory. It was at this point in my pregnancy with Oliver that labor was induced. I'm really starting to feel loaded down lately. My joints are aching a lot and I feel like my tailbone is going to split down the middle. I'm having mobility issues and Miller told me tonight that the floor shakes when I walk(?!). Overall, my spirits have been high though. When I became pregnant this time around I was really nervous about having the strength to take care of little-man Oliver throughout the entire ordeal. Although it hasn't been easy, I'm hanging tough. Dare I say I'm actually enjoying this journey. I think I've been doing far less complaining than I'm entitled to. Pregnancy is rough, but it's such an incredible (yet completely ordinary) miracle that I can't help but enjoy the ride. Life is being created here, yet the whole thing is basically on auto-pilot. A little food, rest, and time and ta-da, baby!

The fact that we're finally in our house is a huge help this time around. It's quiet, comfortable, and OURS! However, I've been exhausting myself trying to get everything in order before #2 arrives. Try going through the nesting experience in a big 'ol brand new house. Anything that needs to be done is pretty much taken care of, but I can't stop myself from trying to tackle all the details. The clock's a-tickin.

The little peanut is doing a lot of stretching lately- she seems to be getting really strong. I can't imagine how she's going to have enough room to keep up all this movement for another 4 weeks. Also, I'm starting to wonder with a good degree of anxiety how large she's going to be at birth. Just think, Oliver was a healthly 7 pounds 2 ounces and born a whole month early. However, they say that every baby is different. Let's hope she's a healthy, reasonable size!

Oliver got socked with a fever twice this week. The first stretch was on Monday through Tuesday. Then he had a check-up on Thursday with a round of immunizations (he's now 23 pounds and 32 inches). Thursday evening his fever returned and lasted through Saturday. He was one unhappy little dude. I spent much of the past week just cuddling him- neither of us would have it any other way. Saturday afternoon/ evening his fever broke and he was back to his unsual jolly self. Today he played hard- lots of laughing, singing and walking all over the house. Tomorrow we should be back on our usual routine.

Only two more weeks of work until the holiday break/ maternity leave!!!

Ma — Sat, 02 Dec 2006 02:48:00 +0000

One small step for mankind:

Ma — Sat, 02 Dec 2006 01:53:00 +0000

…and we’re back! Sorry to have left you hanging for the past 9 months with the dispirited message that Ollie and I were sick. No worries, all is well! We’ve had all sorts of distractions and hiccups over the past year- just enough busyness to use as an excuse for not updating “Hotdogs”. But no longer! Onto the updates….

Highlights of the past several months:

- Post-partum depression?/ thyroid imbalance

o Returning to work after my maternity leave was the worst. In retrospect, I was both physically and mentally unprepared to return, but I felt pressure to get back on the saddle (mainly self-imposed pressure). My employer was gracious enough to let me change my position, but it did not alleviate my discomfort. It was sooooo hard for me to leave Oliver and I felt sad all the time. I felt like a wimp- afterall there are working moms all over the place. I did my best to pull it together, but felt like everyday was an impossible uphill battle. I spoke to my doctor and we discussed the issue of post-partum depression. I decided to take some additional time off of work to get myself back on track. In the meantime, my doctor issued a thyroid test which revealed that my thyroid levels were low. Apparently many women suffer from low-thyroid levels post-partum, resulting in increased feelings of fatigue and depression. This is usually an acute, temporary situation but is often undiagnosed. After a few weeks of taking the meds, I felt a huge difference. I felt like my old self again, but with a baby! The gloom left and my energy and joy returned. Unfortunately I had to stop breast feeding due to the meds, but this probably helped me to feel more normal again. Oliver did just fine with the switch to formula.

- Surprise!

o Two months after I stopped breast feeding, I still hadn’t gotten a period. I thought this was odd and on a whim thought I’d better try a pregnancy test. One thin pink line later, our fate was sealed. New baby on the way! The initial shock passed quickly and we became excited about having another child. We know now that Oliver is going to have a baby sister. Baby #2 expected to drop mid January, which means that I’m already well into the third trimester (33rd week). This pregnancy certainly was not chronicled via 'Hotdogs' the way the previous one was. Things have gone extremely smooth this time around- much less anxiety about every new sensation and fewer complications overall. Let’s hope the delivery will follow suit.

- New house

o We were finally able to move into our new house at the end of July. All of the waiting was worth it. We have tons of space and great neighbors. Lots of space for the kiddos to play and explore. A note to friends and family: we love having visitors!

- Return to work P/T

o Shortly after moving into the new house I returned to work. However, with a baby at home and one on the way, I knew I wouldn’t have much energy to spare. I worked out a temporary part-time position with my employer which has worked out fabulously. After the baby is born I plan on staying home with the kids for quite a while (TBD).

- Oliver turns 1
Our little man is growing fast. He turned 1 on 9/4/06. We celebrated with the family in Wisconsin. He didn't like the birthday cake, but loved his new toys.

o Grub: Oliver is eating like a champ. He’s gone from breast milk to formula, then single-grain cereals, then pureed solid foods, and finally to regular ol’ chunky table food and whole milk. This boy will eat just about anything.

o Chompers: His mouth reluctantly pushed out two bottom teeth just before his first birthday and then four top teeth all at once in the past few weeks.

o Communication: Mostly babbling still going on, but we’ve got the basics covered: mama, dada, kitty, tane (train), bompa and ama (grandpa and grandma), die-die (diaper), and bah-bah (bottle). Ollie is also waving hi/goodbye and pointing at objects of interest.

o Relationships: Once Oliver learned how to smile he smiled at strangers and friends alike- everywhere, all the time. Now that he’s learning to discriminate a bit, he’s a bit more hesitant on showing affection to just anyone. However, the nickname “Smiley” has stuck with him at daycare. When he’s at daycare he tends to play solo more often than not. Although he’s usually pretty content he freaks out with a “nails on the chalkboard” scream when another child takes his toy away and is quite irritable when he’s hungry (just like Mom).

o Locomotion: Oliver scooted around for quite a while until he finally discovered crawling. He took to it quickly and started motoring everywhere. A couple months later he started to pull up to standing, and before long took those first steps while holding onto objects for support. This week he just started walking unsupported! He falls often but is a persistent little guy. His eyes just light up when he toddles around.

For those of you wondering, Miller is doing great as well. As usual, he's been very supportive and helpful (once baseball season was over that is- cough). Speaking of baseball, Oliver made over 20 Sox games this season. Miller did not miss a single home game! Oliver was a trooper at the ballpark. He loved watching people and bouncing around to the music at the games. When I was sick one day, the boys went to a game together and caught a foul ball hit by Iguchi right up to their seats. Great souvenir, eh? We'll see how next season will unfold.

Thanks for hanging in there with us all this time!!! New pics coming soon.

Ma — Tue, 28 Feb 2006 13:58:00 +0000

'Cause I Fell On Sick Days....

Mommy and baby are back together at work- I love it. It's fantastic to walk down the hall and steal some kisses or even just glimpses of Oliver during the day. The work I'm doing is challenging and fulfilling which makes being "away" from Oliver more tolerable. Unfortunately, I came back to the Center just when some nasty viruses were circulating. Oliver and I are both at home with diarrhea and vomiting. I don't know about him, but I have body aches, a congested head and a scratchy throat too. Last Friday I had to bring him home because he had a fever of about 102 degrees. This was the first time I had seen it this high so I kind of freaked out at first. It peaked during the night on Friday and then all was hunky-dory the rest of the weekend. He started showing symptoms again last night, along with me. So we've got a little infirmity set up here at home. He's not as smiley and bubbly as usual today. But he did give me a knowing look like, don't worry Mom, we'll take good care of each other today.

Ma — Sat, 11 Feb 2006 14:32:00 +0000

Told'ya I wasn't going to be any good at posting on this here blog. Some of you have been faithful readers, so I'll give you some updates. Thanks for following along with me. (I keep hearing about friends-of-friends who read this and feel like they know me even though we haven't met. Feel free to send me an email- I'd love to know who's actually reading this!)

Lil' Man is now 5 months old. He's growing at a steady, healthy pace. Here are some highlights:

* Oliver's giggles at funny noises and when tickled, he squeals in delight at Mom and Dad and his favorite toys, makes limited speech sounds (i.e. ah-goo, booo, etc.), and blows air through his slightly closed lips/ tongue

* He spends a lot of time "dancing" while on his back (he swings his arms around and marches his feet)

* When he's on his stomach he tends to arch his back so that his head, arms, and legs are off the ground (think Superman or a yoga pose). Lately he's been getting in this position and then rocking back and forth. Last week while doing this he rolled over for the first time!

* He grasps and reaches for objects (including Mom's hair)

* We started feeding him rice cereal a couple of times a day, even though he spits half of it back out. (It's mostly just for practice and not nutrition at this point.) Otherwise he is still exclusively breastfed.

Somehow I managed to keep up the breastfeeding all these months despite my physical setbacks, my return to work, and the commitment that it requires. I feel both proud and fortunate for being able to breastfeed my baby. The Pediatric Association recommends breastfeeding your baby for the entire first year (!), but some women do for up to 2 years (!!). I plan on starting Oliver on formula in the next week or so, and then nursing him just twice a day (morning and night) until those teeth start coming in. Then we'll take it from there and see what happens! I will be very happy when I won't have to pump anymore. It takes a lot of work to not only clean bottles, but to also have to clean and sanitize pump parts every night. (Speaking of bottles, we use those bag-like drop-in bottles which aren't very enviro-happy but can simply be dropped into the garbage. Also, because the excess air can be pushed out, they are supposed to help prevent ear infections and more closely mimic breastfeeding.) I have to say, when it is time to completely wean Oliver I will miss it. Breastfeeding is a great chance to slow down and enjoy intimate time together (sounds like I'm doing a commercial). But really, it's such a bizarre yet totally natural experience. In the scheme of things, it lasts such a short period of time.

As for myself, the hemotoma fully healed after about a month and a half. In the meantime, the location of the tear itself still didn't seem to feel right. I went back to the doctor in January to discover that, alas, the healing wasn't most desirable. Apparently a tight band had formed (doc described it as "healing too much") and it was painful when touched. So....I had another procedure done to remedy the situation. This meant making getting another numbing shot and another incision to cut through this tight band. I thought, oh lordy, here we go again. I dug out my sitz bath, spray bottle and donut pillow planning on another long healing process. Luckily, I was back in the game relatively soon. The procedure was done on a Thursday and I was back at work the following Wednesday. Things seem to be coming around (except for those hemorrhoids that never really went away and are bleeding more each time I go to the bathroom....gaaaahhh... I give up!)

Ma — Sat, 10 Dec 2005 02:10:00 +0000

Oliver is already 3 months old! Mommy is back to work and Oliver is in daycare. Breastfeeding is still underway (thanks to a little daytime pumping). Daddy is still cooking dinner and keeping the kitchen clean for us. All is well! Our new family is happy and strong. Every day is a joy.

I've been very busy now that I'm back at work. Time to post on this blog is slim. Besides, I'd rather spend all my spare moments with our little man. He's already close to 13 pounds and measures over 24.5 inches, and all smiles! :)

Ma — Wed, 09 Nov 2005 22:43:00 +0000

Oliver is 2 months old!

The days are flying by and it's almost time for Mommy to return to work. Boo hoo! I've been having a wonderful time at home. Some days I get a little cabin feverish, even when I go for a walk or to the store with Ollie. But overall, I've been soaking up every minute with our little peanut.

Oliver is now 11 pounds, 11 ounces and measures over 23 inches. He is at the 50th percentile for both measurements. (More confirmation that breastfeeding is indeed going well. I never really know how much he's eating since I can't see the quantity, unlike with bottle feeding. I really look forward to those Dr.'s office stats!) Also, Oliver was doused with his first round of shots. He got a whole barrage of vaccinations in 3 shots. He screamed for a bit, and then looked as if nothing happened (I think it hurt me worse than it did him). He was pretty irritable for the remainder of that day, and was then back to normal by that night.

He's beginning to look around at different objects in the environment more often. He follows me with his eyes when I move through the room, and he sort of bats at the animals hanging on his bouncer seat. He's very smiley and coos often, especially in the morning. The first real smiles melted my heart. I love his big gummy grins!! He even smiles at strangers and the animals mentioned above! What a happy little guy he seems to be!

We've been dragging Ollie all over the place including downtown Chicago for the big Sox championship parade and rally, a wedding in Madison, a family visit to Lake Geneva, and backstage/onstage at the Metro for a Halloween weekend 446 show. He's been a trooper. He seems to enjoy moving around and being in new places. He gets cranky when he's sitting still in the house too long. All this dragging around, however, resulted in Mommy and Ollie getting colds at the end of October. They were mild and short, luckily. At first I felt a little guilty, but our doctor said the benfits of being exposed to new experiences and germs will only enhance his cognitive growth and ultimately strengthen his immune system. Makes sense to me. Off we go!

Oliver's October pictures are posted on Snapfish.

Ma — Sun, 16 Oct 2005 22:30:00 +0000

Happy 6 weeks birthday to Oliver!

The days are flying by- it's hard to get myself to post. Plus I've been miserable at returning emails and phone calls. Oliver demands so much of my attention. And I thought I would tackle some of those "stuffed in the corner projects I've been meaning to get to" while on maternity leave- ha!

PICTURES! PICTURES! Here is a collection of photos from Ollie's first month on planet Earth. (As usual, courtesy of Snapfish.)

Oliver's 1 month Dr.'s appointment:
Weight: 9 pounds, Length: 22 inches
He put on almost two pounds and one inch since birth. I guess all that breastfeeding is paying off. I struggled greatly in the second/ third week. The pain was so great that I wanted to give up. After some re-adjusting and some desensitizing, we got back on track. It was a relief to hear that Oliver is growing according to averages (in the early months, about an ounce each day and an inch each month).

After getting through the brestfeeding difficulties, we started to cruise. However, over the past week or so, Ollie became really fussy. He would cry all the time- day and night (I was up about every 45 minutes at night for almost a week). We went through our crying checklist (hunger, dirty diaper, love/attn, etc), but he kept crying. It sounded to me like he was often uncomfortable, even in pain. I felt horrible that I couldn't figure out what was wrong, but I started feeling worse when my own fatigue began to set in. There were several nights in a row when I cried out loud right along with Ollie. I was pretty sure that he was having gas pain and digestive problems. I hit up my parenting books and websites pretty hard for some help. We did some troubleshooting and managed to get him to relax. Ever since, he's been all cute and peaceful again. I guess this is just part of the rollercoaster that we'll be on for the months to come.

p.s. Miller read part of my previous post out loud to me. Parts of it sound a bit, oh, overdone. I guess I can't help but wear my heart on my sleve when it comes to Jr.saurus. He's my world right now. So as far as I'm concerned, no shame!

Ma — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 01:26:00 +0000

I'm totally in love with Oliver. He has taken over every aspect of my life, but I have no hard feelings whatsoever! I understand what people mean when they say that a baby will completely change your life. Every single thing that I do now is done AFTER considering how Oliver fits into that action. Pretty profound.

Oliver has been great. He sleeps for 2-3 hour intervals and then demands to eat. He's taken well to breastfeeding, while I constantly work to iron out the kinks. He sleeps almost all of the time, which I guess is pretty common. When his eyes are open, I'm captivated. I love those moments when he's quiet and content, and just gazes around trying to piece together the world around him. These are the times that he will stare into my eyes as if memorizing my features. I don't know how to describe the feeling other than it feels like staring into infinity. In his eyes I see an endless string of ancestors that came before, as well as a whole new life waiting to unfold. I imagine how he will develop and who he will become. I see simplicity, clarity, and peace. I hope to always remember these moments.

Ma — Tue, 27 Sep 2005 01:08:00 +0000

We traveled down to Wausau yesterday to visit family and friends there. It's great to visit with everyone, but I'm beat. All this traveling around is messing with Ollie's sleep schedule a bit, so he's been fussy at night. With all the visiting we've been doing, I've been missing out on those sacred daytime naps. I'm looking forward to getting home and getting completely healed.

So far the healing process seems to be going well. I still have some swelling, so I'm not totally convinced that everything is 100%, but I definitely feel better that I had been over the past couple of weeks.

We gave Oliver his first real bath today (Miller's relatives gave us a baby tub). At first he seemed uncertain, but then he fully embraced the experience. It was fun for all of us! I think this is going to turn into one of my favorite caregiving tasks.

Ma — Sat, 24 Sep 2005 23:25:00 +0000

Yet another epic day...
On Friday, Sept 23:

1) I woke up with very heavy bleeding at 4am. I thought that all the swelling I was experiencing had caused my stitches to rip out. Miller and I packed up Oliver and went to the ER. (My insurance just changed, so I had to go to a new hospital.) The doctor examined me and noted that the swelling I had was not normal. My stitches however have apparently almost completely healed. Only a small little hole remained, which is where the bleeding originated (due to the increased amount of swelling right next to it.) The doctor diagnosed the swelling as a cyst- an inflamed/infected gland next to the vaginal opening. She said that these cysts are typically treated by cutting open and draining them. However, since I was still healing up from the stitches, they didn't want to introduce anymore incisions to the area if not necessary. I was given an antibiotic and Motrin to treat the pain and inflamation. I was told to return to the ER if the condition worsened. I left still in pain, but relieved that the bleeding wasn't due to ripped out stitches.

2) Miller left work early and the three of us traveled up to Northern WI for a planned visit with family and friends. The trip took about 6 hours. Ollie did well, although he got tired of being strapped into that car seat for so long. His floppy little body got pretty slumpy at times, so the bumps made him holler. We stopped a couple of times for feeding/ changing breaks. Overall, the trip went quite well. I was pretty swollen and unhappy by the time we arrived. I'm not sure if Oliver or I was more happy to get out of that car.

3) At 12:30 at night, I felt that something wasn't right. I was hurting pretty badly, and when I went to the bathroom I realized I was bleeding very heavily this time. So, we made ANOTHER trip to the ER, this time in Rhinelander, WI. Long story short, I was diagnosed with a "vulvular hematoma" (a broken blood vessel on/in the vulva formed a blood clot which contined to swell up). The doctor decided to cut open and drain the hematoma. After creating the incision, apparently a big clamp was applied to the swollen area to help drain the fluid- thankfully I found this out after the procedure. I was given an anesthetic, but this only numbs the skin, not the underlying tissue. (Yes, OUCH!!! This was NOT, NOT, NOT a pleasant experience. In fact, this was pretty close to the same place on the pain scale as the labor and delivery itself was. Although this pain was more acute and localized, so arguably worse!) Anyway, about 30 minutes after the procedure, I felt so much better. Better, in fact, than I had in about 2 weeks. I no longer need to sit on that goofy inflated donut, and can sit upright all day without too much trouble. There is a small chance that the hematoma could refill and need to be removed via invase surgery. However, the doctor said that as long as I keep pressure on the area, it should heal up and be over. So far, so good. I'm hoping and praying that THIS is the end of this big 'ol fiasco.

Ma — Fri, 23 Sep 2005 01:14:00 +0000

Today is the Autumnal Equinox...Happy Fall!

Ma — Thu, 22 Sep 2005 01:27:00 +0000

I'm still not healed. My stitches are making me miserable. I seem to have a lot of swelling on one side- it's very tender and painful. I think the swelling might be increasing, although I'm not sure. My patience is wearing thin. Since I have trouble sitting upright for very long, it is hard to care for Oliver the way I'd like to. Does it really take this long to heal from delivery? I think it's time to visit the doctor to get this checked out.

Ma — Mon, 19 Sep 2005 01:05:00 +0000

Ollie's umbilical cord stump has fallen off!

Ma — Fri, 16 Sep 2005 01:03:00 +0000

Oliver's first doctor's appointment:

Weight: 7 lbs, 5oz (added 3 ounces since birth)
Length: 21 inches (same as birth)

Dr. says he's "perfect"!!!

Ma — Tue, 13 Sep 2005 01:30:00 +0000

Oliver is now one week and one day old. The first week has been exciting, tiring, painful (the stitches are not fun), and magical. I'm loving every moment getting to know our little guy. He sleeps a lot and keeps his eyes closed much of the time. But as the days pass, his personality shines through more and more. It's incredible how something so tiny, vulnerable, and dependent can completely take over your entire world. I'm so pleased and proud to have Oliver in my life.

A lot of people have been asking about the name we chose. We had considered different names during the pregnancy, but didn't have it entirely finalized until the weekend of the birth. Miller and I heard the name Oliver many months ago. For some reason it just stuck with us; plus, I really like the nickname Ollie. Miller came up with the middle name Wendell out of the blue (he chose Herman first, which I poo pooed). At first I wasn't so sure, but there was a nice flow and something familiar about the name Oliver Wendell. (Of course, we eventually recalled that the name is the same as the famous Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr. and Sr., which didn't really have anything to do with our choosing of the name.) The real clincher for me is the origin/ meaning of the name:
Oliver (latin) = olive tree/ peace
Wendell (german) = wanderer/ seeker